How To Include Family in Your Elopement
Just because you’re choosing to elope doesn’t mean you have to leave your loved ones out. Whether you’re planning a Vancouver wedding with just a few guests or a private Vancouver Island elopement, there are so many heartfelt ways to include family in your elopement. As a Vancouver wedding photographer, I’ve seen so many beautiful moments where couples bring their families into the experience—without compromising the intimate, intentional feel of the day.
If you’re dreaming of a candid, authentic, and timeless wedding day, these ideas will help you feel connected to your people, even in the most intimate of settings.
1. Have Them Get Ready With You
This is one of the most emotional parts of any wedding day. Whether you’re getting ready in a cozy Airbnb in Tofino or a boutique hotel in downtown Vancouver, inviting your family to share this time with you adds so much warmth to the morning. It’s a unique bonding experience full of hugs, happy tears, laughter, and maybe even a mimosa (or two). Plus, these moments make for the most authentic and timeless photos.
2. Include Them in the Detail
Even if your elopement is small, there are plenty of ways to include your family in the wedding details. Maybe your bouquet features your mom’s favourite flower, or you wear your grandmother’s earrings. I’ve photographed couples who included tokens from loved ones who’ve passed in their attire or bouquet, and others who incorporated heirloom jewelry or pieces of their parents’ wedding outfits. These little touches create so much meaning—and as a photographer, I love capturing them.
3. Read Letters From Family During the Day
If your elopement is just the two of you, letters from your family are the perfect way to feel their presence. Ask them to write a note for you to read during your elopement—whether it’s words of encouragement, love, or advice. It’s such a simple way to include family in your elopement while still keeping the day intimate. This is one of my favourite moments to photograph—there’s nothing quite like capturing those raw, real reactions.
4. Share a Meal With Them
Whether it’s brunch the morning of or dinner the evening after, sharing a meal is a beautiful way to include family without needing them there for the whole day. I’ve seen couples do a private ceremony at Whytecliff Park or Lynn Canyon, then head to a Vancouver restaurant or Airbnb dinner party with family afterward. If you want to keep your ceremony sacred and quiet, but still celebrate, this is the best of both worlds.
5. Invite Them to Join an Activity or Adventure
Some of the best elopements I’ve photographed included casual hiking, beach walks, or paddleboarding post-ceremony—and yes, family can totally be a part of that. Whether you’re eloping at East Sooke Park, Rathtrevor Beach, or the Sea to Sky Gondola, there’s room to make memories together. If you’re keeping it laid-back and personal, why not invite your loved ones along for the fun?
6. Give Them a Role or Task
This is a wonderful way to include family in your elopement planning. Whether it’s picking up flowers, helping with ceremony setup, or choosing a playlist, small roles can mean a lot. I’ve seen moms pick out ribbons for bouquets, siblings help with outfit decisions, and even dads build simple arches. Giving your loved ones something tangible to do helps them feel connected and appreciated.
7. Invite Them Dress or Suit Shopping
One of the most exciting parts of elopement planning is choosing your outfit—and it’s even more fun with your favourite people by your side. Whether you’re trying on dresses in Gastown or picking out a tailored suit in Victoria, bring your family along and make it a day to remember. It’s a great way to include them early in the process and let them share in the excitement.
8. Ask a Family Member to Officiate
If you’re legally allowed to do so in your chosen location, having a family member officiate your ceremony is one of the most personal ways to include them. I’ve photographed many Vancouver weddings and elopements where a sibling, parent, or family friend leads the vows—it always brings such a unique, emotional touch to the ceremony.
9. Give Them a Gift on the Day Of
A small token of appreciation can go a long way. Whether it’s a handwritten card, custom jewelry, a framed photo, or even a surprise pregnancy announcement (yes, I’ve seen this!), giving your family something special on your elopement day helps them feel remembered and valued—even if they’re not physically there.
You can Still Have a Family-Filled Elopement
Eloping doesn’t mean cutting your loved ones out. Whether you’re planning a candid and intimate Vancouver wedding, a coastal adventure in Tofino, or an off-the-grid ceremony in Strathcona Park, there are countless ways to include family in your elopement without sacrificing the quiet, intentional feel you’re after.
Need help capturing the day in a way that feels true to you? I’d love to be your Vancouver wedding photographer and help tell your story with timeless, genuine imagery that celebrates every detail—big or small.
Still have more questions about including family at elopements?
How do I include people in an elopement?
You can include family in your elopement in many meaningful ways—whether or not they’re physically present. Some couples invite a small group to witness their vows, while others involve family through getting ready together, exchanging letters, sharing a meal, or even having a loved one officiate. If you’re planning a Vancouver elopement or Vancouver Island elopement, there are many scenic spots that can accommodate intimate groups for a candid, authentic, and timeless wedding experience.
Should I have family at my elopement?
That’s entirely up to you. Elopements are all about creating a day that feels true to you and your partner. If having your family there feels important, absolutely include them! Many Vancouver weddings and destination elopements include parents, siblings, or a few close friends. You can also involve family in the planning process or host a post-elopement celebration to share the joy.
How to tell family you are eloping?
Be honest and lead with your “why.” Explain that you’re choosing to elope because it feels most meaningful, stress-free, or personal for you. Reassure them that it’s not about excluding anyone—it’s about focusing on your love story. You can also share ways you plan to include them, like through letters, photos, or a celebration later. As a Vancouver wedding photographer, I’ve seen many couples navigate this beautifully by blending intimacy with inclusion.
How do you include family in a wedding ceremony?
You can include family in your elopement ceremony by asking them to do a reading, walk you down the aisle (if you choose to have one), or even act as your officiant if the location allows. Personal touches—like holding a family heirloom or acknowledging loved ones in your vows—can also make your ceremony feel heartfelt and inclusive.
Do you invite people to elopement?
Yes, if you want to! Elopements can include just the two of you, or a handful of close people. It’s your day—there’s no wrong way to structure it. Whether it’s a quiet forest ceremony or a beachside Vancouver Island elopement with your best friends, the guest list should reflect your comfort level and vision.
How do you structure an elopement?
An elopement timeline can be as laid-back or detailed as you’d like. Typically, it includes getting ready, a first look, a ceremony, time for portraits, and a post-ceremony activity—like a picnic, hike, or intimate dinner. A good Vancouver wedding photographer will help you build a flow that feels natural while ensuring you have space for those candid, timeless moments.
What is the downside of elopement?
Some couples feel a sense of loss over not having all their loved ones present or missing out on traditional wedding elements. However, many couples say that choosing an elopement allowed them to feel more present and less stressed. With creative ways to include family in your elopement, you can still honor those relationships while staying true to your vision.
How many guests are at an elopement?
Elopements typically range from 0 to 20 guests. If you’re dreaming of an intimate Vancouver elopement or Victoria elopement, many stunning natural spots and venues can accommodate small gatherings—just make sure to check any permit or guest limits for your chosen location
Can you have bridesmaids at an elopement?
Absolutely! Elopements don’t mean abandoning tradition entirely. If having a best friend or sibling by your side matters to you, include them as a bridesmaid or groomsman. Many couples planning a candid and authentic wedding still enjoy a getting-ready moment with their people—it adds depth, meaning, and fun to the day.
