Should I Elope?

“do i even want a big wedding?”

If you’ve been Googling “Vancouver elopement,” asking yourself “should I elope,” or wondering if a big wedding is really your vibe, you’re not alone. So many couples come to me, a Vancouver wedding photographer, unsure whether to go all-out with a traditional wedding or lean into something more intimate and intentional. The truth? You don’t have to do what everyone else is doing.

If the thought of planning a massive event makes you feel overwhelmed (and maybe even a little anxious), eloping might be exactly what you need. Authentic weddings don’t have to include 200 guests, 10 speeches, or a late-night sparkler sendoff. They can be candid, quiet, meaningful, and full of only the things that matter most to you.

I’m a big believer that timeless wedding photography comes from capturing real moments—not forced traditions. And more and more, I’m seeing couples in BC opt for elopements in Vancouver and the surrounding areas because they want their day to feel like them, not a performance.

So should I elope or have a big wedding?

Ultimately, I can’t tell you what’s right for you, but I can definitely help you get there. Below are a few questions you can ask yourself to figure out whether an elopement might be a better fit.

Should I Elope Or Not: Questions To Ask Yourself

Do you enjoy being the center of attention?

Big weddings come with a lot of eyes on you—from the walk down the aisle to your first dance. If that makes you feel uncomfortable, a small Vancouver elopement might be a better option.

How do you feel about wedding traditions?

Bouquet toss? Cake cutting? These can be sweet moments—or they can feel totally unnecessary. If you don’t care about traditional wedding rituals, eloping gives you permission to skip it all and do something that actually feels like you.

Are you okay saying your vows in front of a crowd?

With elopements, you get to exchange vows in a setting that feels private and sacred. Whether it’s just the two of you, or a few loved ones, the moment stays focused on your connection.

Do you want time and space to truly enjoy the day?

Big weddings can fly by in a blur. Elopements offer a slower pace and the freedom to be fully present. You’re not rushed by timelines—you get to savor the whole day.

Are you hesitant to spend thousands on guests you won’t even speak to?

A big wedding often means paying for a lot of people you might barely see. With an elopement, your budget goes toward things that really matter to you—like a dream location, a cozy dinner, or a photographer you trust.

Do you want to travel or stay local?

Eloping gives you more flexibility—whether you want to stay close to home in Vancouver or head off on a destination adventure.

Want to do something unique and totally “you” on your wedding day?

Elopements aren’t just about simplicity—they’re about doing things your way. Want to go snowshoeing in Whistler or say your vows during a mountaintop picnic? Let’s make it happen. Your wedding can be whatever you want it to be.

what are the pros and cons of eloping?

PRO: You can elope whenever, wherever. No venue waitlists or juggling a hundred schedules. Just you, your partner, and the moment.

CON: You’ll need to narrow down your guest list—and some important people might not be able to attend.

PRO: You have total freedom. Want to canoe across a glacial lake or have a slow morning getting ready together in a cabin? You can.

CON: You might miss the big party aspect of a traditional wedding.

PRO: There’s so much less pressure. You’re not performing for anyone. You’re just soaking it in, fully present with the one you love.

CON: Choosing the right vendors is key. You’ll want a photographer (hi!) who specializes in authentic, candid moments and knows how to help your elopement feel like you.

Ready to Ditch the Stress and Elope in Vancouver?

If you’re leaning toward a Vancouver elopement (or destination elopement – I travel!), I’d love to help you plan your wedding and document it in a way that feels fun, relaxed, and deeply meaningful. I’m all about capturing timeless wedding photography that’s full of joy and connection—no stiff poses or pressure, just the real stuff.

Let’s create something beautiful together. Connect with your Vancouver wedding and elopement photographer today.

Still have a few more questions? Here are some commonly asked questions about elopements you might be wondering.

What are the disadvantages of eloping?
Eloping can feel isolating to some couples, especially if they hoped to celebrate with friends or family. Some may miss the big party, traditional moments, or having loved ones witness their vows. It can also cause disappointment among family members who expected to be part of the day.

Is it better to elope or have a wedding?
Whether it’s better to elope or have a wedding depends on your personal values, budget, and vision for your day. Eloping offers intimacy and flexibility, while a wedding allows for a shared celebration with a larger group. There’s no right answer—just what’s right for you.

Is it normal to want to elope?
Yes, it’s absolutely normal to want to elope. Many couples prefer a more private and intentional celebration, especially if large events feel overwhelming or don’t reflect their relationship.

What is the point of getting eloped?
The point of eloping is to focus solely on your relationship and the commitment you’re making—without distractions, pressure, or expectations. It’s a chance to create a deeply meaningful experience, often in a location that’s special to you.

Can elope mean run away?
Traditionally, “elope” meant to run away and get married in secret. Today, eloping simply means choosing a non-traditional, often smaller wedding that focuses on the couple. It doesn’t have to be a secret or rushed—it can be beautifully planned and intentional.

What are the consequences of elopement?
Some possible consequences include upsetting family or friends who expected to be involved. However, with clear communication and intentional planning, these challenges can often be softened. Many couples feel more peace and satisfaction with their decision after eloping.

Why do people regret eloping?
Regret often comes from unmet expectations or pressure from family. Some couples may miss having loved ones present or feel they rushed into the decision without fully thinking it through. That’s why it’s important to consider your priorities and long-term feelings when deciding.

What is an elope risk?
In the context of weddings, the “risk” of eloping is potentially missing out on traditional experiences or facing pushback from others

Is it a sin to elope?
In most modern religious and cultural contexts, eloping is not considered a sin. However, views can vary depending on religious beliefs or family traditions. If faith is important to you, consider discussing your plans with a spiritual advisor or family member.

Why is elopement sometimes a crisis?
Elopement can be seen as a crisis in specific contexts—such as a young couple eloping without parental knowledge, or someone leaving a safe space in a medical or behavioral setting. In weddings, it may cause tension if done in secrecy without communicating with loved ones.

Am I selfish for wanting to elope?
Not at all. Wanting to elope is about choosing what feels right for you and your partner. Your wedding should reflect your values and your love—not be a performance for others. As long as the decision is made with care and intention, it’s not selfish.

Can you tell people you’re eloping?
Absolutely! You can let people know beforehand or after your elopement. Many couples choose to share the news with close family or friends ahead of time, or plan a celebration after. It’s totally up to you.

What is the downside of elopement?
The main downside is that you may miss out on having your loved ones physically present. If you value shared experiences or big family moments, this could be hard. But many couples find ways to include loved ones later or virtually.

Do people who elope stay together longer?
There’s no guaranteed outcome either way. However, studies suggest that couples who spend less on their wedding and focus more on their relationship tend to report higher satisfaction. Eloping often falls into this category.

Is eloping a real marriage?
Yes, eloping is 100% a real marriage—as long as it’s legally officiated and the proper paperwork is filed. Whether you say your vows in front of 100 people or just each other, it’s just as valid.

Should I keep my elopement a secret?
That depends on your relationship with your family and what feels right for you. Some couples choose secrecy to avoid pressure, while others share the news with loved ones. If you do keep it secret, consider how and when you’ll eventually share the big news.

Is eloping taboo?
Eloping used to be considered taboo, but not anymore. Today, elopements are widely accepted as a personal, meaningful, and intentional way to get married. Many couples choose to elope because it aligns better with their values and priorities.

Why eloping was the best decision?
Couples often say eloping was the best decision because it allowed them to focus on each other, avoid stress, save money, and celebrate their love in a way that felt authentic. It removes pressure and lets you design a day that’s entirely you.

What is the point of eloping?
The point of eloping is to celebrate your love in a deeply personal way, free from outside expectations or obligations. It’s about creating a moment that’s meaningful to you, whether that’s just the two of you or a small circle of loved ones.

Is it better to get married or just stay single?
That depends on what you want from life and love. Marriage offers legal benefits, emotional connection, and long-term partnership—but it’s not for everyone. Staying single can mean more independence and freedom. Neither is “better”—just different paths.

How many people should be invited to an elopement?
Elopements typically include 0–20 guests, though some couples stretch the number to 30. It really depends on your vision. Some elopements are “just us,” while others feel more like intimate micro-weddings with close family and friends.

Is it okay to have a bridal shower if you elope?
Yes, absolutely! Even if you’re eloping, your loved ones may want to celebrate with you—and a bridal shower can be a lovely way to do that. Just be clear about your plans so expectations are aligned.

What type of person elopes?
People who elope are often independent, intentional, and value experiences over tradition. They tend to want a low-stress, deeply meaningful day that reflects who they are—not just what’s expected

Does elope mean run away?
Historically, yes—elope meant to run away and secretly get married. But today, it simply means choosing a non-traditional wedding, often without a large guest list or big production. It no longer implies secrecy or rebellion.

Do you tell people when you elope?
You can! Some couples tell close loved ones in advance, while others wait and make an announcement after. There’s no wrong way to do it—just what feels right for your relationship and family dynamic.

Do you walk down the aisle when you elope?
You can if you want to! Elopements are flexible and customizable. Some couples include traditional elements like walking down the aisle, while others keep it simple with a spontaneous exchange of vows.

Do people get engaged before eloping?
Yes, most couples still get engaged before eloping. The timeline is often shorter and the planning simpler, but many still celebrate their engagement and use it as a transition into wedding planning.

How do you announce eloping etiquette?
Announce your elopement in a way that fits your style—some couples send out elopement announcement cards, post on social media, or host a post-elopement party. Be thoughtful in how you share the news, especially if some family members may be surprised.

Is eloping supposed to be a secret?
Not necessarily. Eloping can be a secret, but it doesn’t have to be. Many couples are open about their elopement plans or include a few loved ones. It’s all about what feels right for you.

Should you tell family before or after elopement?
That depends on your relationship with your family. If you think they’ll be hurt by not knowing, it may be kind to give them a heads up. But if you need space to make the decision without pressure, telling them after is totally okay.

Do you say vows when you elope?
Yes! Elopements are often the perfect time for personal vows. You can write your own or use traditional ones, but exchanging vows is still a powerful part of most elopements.

What do people do when they elope?
Eloping couples usually have a ceremony (just the two of them or with a few guests), take photos, and celebrate however they want—whether that’s hiking, having a picnic, exploring a new city, or dining at a favorite restaurant. The day is fully customizable.

What to know before eloping?
Before you elope, know the legal requirements of the location, decide if you’ll include any guests, and plan how you want the day to feel. Think about what’s meaningful to you both and don’t be afraid to make it your own.

What do you say when you elope?
You can say anything from traditional vows to fully customized promises. Many couples take the opportunity to speak from the heart without pressure, since elopements allow for a quiet and intimate setting.